My Hero, My Hope

December 10, 2018

My Hero, My Hope

Be not downcast, my soul…

My Daddy’s favorite time of year is Christmas. He loves the songs, the movies (queue “White Christmas,” “Holiday Inn,” “Miracle on 34^th Street,” “Bells of St Mary’s,” my favorite, “It’s a Wonderful Life,” the 1985 Disney Channel Christmas, “Mickey’s Christmas Carol,” etc. on repeat), the giving (he loves to make people yelp with happiness!), the story, and the general mood.

My Daddy has had declining health for quite a few years. Some days were better than others. He always tried to pretend like nothing was wrong.

My Daddy went to heaven today.

He always said he prayed that when God wanted him, He would let him just “go to sleep” in his own bed and not wake up. We just didn’t expect it to happen so soon. Not near Christmas. Truthfully, not anytime.

No one expects to lose someone they love. Never. No matter how sick they are or how many times they’ve been close or how many doctors have said “he can go at any time.”

No one ever expects to not be able to hear their voice again… No more long discussions about book ideas, parenting, the vastness of God’s amazing universe, the connections from one smile to a healed heart to God’s blessing.

We are human. We never expect separation from those we love.

God didn’t intend that either. In the beginning, there was no death. No separation. We were to live forever. In today’s fallen world, we do have death – “separation.”

Those with God’s light within them know this is only a temporary separation, and that gives us tremendous hope. We know, know, know that we will be reunited once again in heaven. My hero and my hope as a child was in my Daddy; as an adult, I learned that God is both of our heroes and both our hopes.

And that led my mind to an image that made me cry with joy.

My Daddy lost his mother when he was 12 and his father when he was nearly twenty. It had been nearly 50 years since he’d seen his dad and almost 60 since he’d seen his mom.

I imagined my Daddy running (yes, in his new body!) to be gathered in a hug by his mother and father. They’d be joined by his brother, two older sisters, and family gone before. My Daddy gets to go home where he is dancing, running, jumping, enjoying the beautiful garden he’s always imagined was in heaven (he used to say he would love for God to let him tend a garden).

I know we will miss him.

The child growing within me will not see Granddaddy Pearson on this Earth.

God did grant his request. God allowed my Daddy to die at home, in his bed. Daddy went into what Mom thought was a seizure. Mom caught him, called to God to help her, then she says Daddy took a huge breath, looked at her, and told her, “I love you. We’ve had a great life together… …I know I’m fading. I want to go home.” They got to say goodbye.

Those we love are never truly gone. They live on in our memories, thoughts, and hearts forever.

Thank you, Jesus, for giving me an amazing wonderful father. Thank you for the memories I hold dear. Thank you for allowing him to die at home in peaceful surroundings.

Hold those of us pained by this Earthly separation as we grasp the hope that is salvation. We know we will be reunited with Gaylord Pearson again in heaven. My goodness, what a l-o-o-o-o-n-g conversation Daddy and I will have when we meet again!